For the Military Wife — Why Boudoir Images Matter
Some of my most frequent clients are military wives. At first it took me a second to figure out why this was a trend, but then it all hit me. If you’re a military wife, then consider these six reasons why a boudoir session is a great idea:
- It reminds your partner how beautiful and sexy you are every time they look at the images.
- It can help foster emotional intimacy in your relationship even though you are miles apart from each other. Remember, it’s not just the images, but the fact that you took the time to do something like this for your partner.
- It keeps your physical connection alive, which is one of the most difficult parts of having a partner leave home for a long period of time. I’ve had some clients write sexy notes with (or even on the back of) their images!
- It gives your partner something tangible to hold onto when they are away for long stretches of time. They may not always have easy access to the internet or electronic devices, but they do get to have physical belongings with them.
- It’s an opportunity for you to do something for yourself, as well. Sometimes that bit of self-care can make all the difference!
- It’s romantic and traditional. Today’s boudoir images may be a little different from the wallet images held onto by military men of the past, but it’s a traditional all the same.
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Loving Your Body & Quitting the Comparison Game
There something that happens at almost every boudoir session I shoot, and I bet you could guess what it is within three tries. Many of my clients — no matter how beautiful each and every single one of them is — says something negative about themselves at some point in the process. Even though I understand why it happens (hello marketing and social media), it bums me out every single time.
Today, I’m challenging you to stop the body comparison game, and to do your best to be kind to yourself. Your body is incredible, you are stunning, and there’s not a single person out there like you so what’s the point of comparing in the first place? Starting today, take five minutes every day to write down one thing something positive about your physical self, and one thing positive about your non-physical self. It takes work to build ourselves up and to stop the comparison game, but it can be done and it can be transformative!
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Your Hands and Feet Matter.
Though your face and other body attributes may be the highlights of your boudoir photoshoot, your hands and feet will be visible in most shots as well. The scene, clothing, or lack thereof will initially draw the viewers eye into the composition; however, your curves and body lines are what will draw the eye throughout the entire image and keep it there. Improperly posed, cropped, or cut off digits or appendages create conflict in the viewers mind and cause the eye to leave the image.
Your hands and feet are part of those lines and curves and play a significant part in the success or failure of the image. Get them camera ready by exfoliating and moisturizing beforehand or treating yourself to a manicure/pedicure the day before your shoot to give your hands and feet a flawless finish.
For a timeless look Choose a polish shade for your fingernails and toenails that matches your lingerie. For a universal fit, your safe bet is to go clear, beige, or light-pink. You can sophisticate these muted options with French manicure, or by adding nail art, or, for a bold and fierce classic look, go with red. If you’re not planning to wear high heels, be sure to pay particular attention to bottoms of your feet.
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Shades of red lipstick that are fire
Let us start by saying there is a red lipstick out there for everyone, regardless of skin tone and complexion. If you think red isn't for you, stop right there. There's one out there made for you! Besides, not all shades are created equally.
Berry Red
Seek out these colors if you have a fair or light skin tone for a bold look!
Ruby Red
A universal staple in the red lipstick world that makes a statement for everyone.
Fiery Red
A timeless color that anyone can wear - if you're comfortable with something with a bang!
Suede Red
This color boasts peachy or golden undertones. Dreamy and glowing!
Orange-Red
Not too bright and not too crazy. A lovely pop of color that matches so well with darker complexions.
Dark Vampire Red
A moody color choice that looks stunning on any skin tone.
Pink-Red
Especially for fair skin tones, finding a gentle pink-red shade will compliment your natural undertone.
Brick Red
If you have a medium skin tone, then warm red is your friend.
Wine Red
Dark skin paired with a deep red lip color is a match made in heaven.
Coral Red
Olive skin? This is for you. The orange-based red compliments this skin tone perfectly.
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Don't forget to bring!
Your favorite food. Bring it, and let's dig in! When people think of boudoir, they think of fancy chocolate-covered strawberries. You don't have to fit that bill. Bring donuts, pizza, sushi, or wine!
Your favorite pieces of jewelry. This can be your wedding ring, a sentimental necklace, or anything else to help zing your images.
Your lingerie. Such a shocker! We have a boudoir closet you are welcome to use. But if you're prepared, you'll remember these and bring them!
Your stockings or thigh highs. They are great for accentuating legs!
Especially with heels, everything looks smooth and classy.
Your props. Don't forget to bring them! You man's hat, your bridal veil, sports helmet, headphones, or even artsy props like perfume bottles. We have seen light sabers and chain mail to calf ropes and paddle boards. Bring whatever it is that does it for you or the recipient of your images to give your session and images that personal touch.
If your eyes dry out quickly and become irritated from makeup, you might want to purchase a bottle of eye drops to prevent this from happening!
Bring your lipstick. It won't last all day and touching it up is a lifesaver. For those that prefer the natural look, bring whatever you prefer to use to moisten your lips.
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Boudoir is for everyone!
It's empowering!
It doesn't matter who you are or why you want to do it. Even men can book a dudeoir session! We've all carried different stories. Sometimes in the midst of life's chaos, it's perfectly fine to acknowledge your worth. Being confident is beautiful. And sometimes, we need to reassure ourselves we still got-it-going-on.
It's fun!
It's that straightforward. The weeks leading up are exhilarating in itself! You begin the journey of self-love. It's motivating to have something like boudoir to look forward to – The entire session is an intense experience! We turn up the music, set the mood, and get the party started!
It's a celebration!
Your body is your temple. Cherish it! Maybe you birthed children; it's a perfect time to honor it. Maybe you reached your goal weight; it's an achievement you should capture! Maybe you love your scars; embrace those. Or maybe, you love every roll and dip; do the shoot!
It's a unique gift!
Regardless of whether it's a couple's session or solo session, it's a great way to gift your partner with something memorable. Spice things up and just do it!
It's pampering!
Who doesn't like a little pampering? We encourage you to visit a salon or spa the days leading up to your boudoir session. Freshen up your hair color and get a cut - guys, too! Visit a nail salon and take in every single moment.
It's a photoshoot!
YOU'RE IN THE SPOTLIGHT! Your session is going to be a hit. Sure, you might be bashful. But sometime during your session, you're going to blossom. It's the awakening moment when you realize just how amazing you are. You'll be proud of yourself for doing something for you.
It's a special time!
We will lift you up and offer words of encouragement! It's time to break outside of your comfortable boundaries and dive straight in! There's always something in your life to love and celebrate. Let this be a gift to you!
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1. Play Music – Bring your favorite music to play during your session. This will help you to calm down and feel comfortable.
2. Deep Breathing – Practice deep breathing. This is a proven relaxation method. Breathe in deeply through your nose and exhale through your nose. Repeat until you feel better.
3. Take a Break – If you’re feeling overwhelmed, we can take a break from shooting and talk and relax before resuming the session.
4. If you enjoy a drink – feel free to have a drink or two, but just enough to help you feel relaxed and cut loose.
5. Laugh It Off – If you’re feeling silly in front of the camera, laugh at yourself. Laughter is a great relaxation technique. It will help you loosen up. You will be surprised at how many cute candid moments of you that can be captured and will make an excellent addition to your boudoir experience.
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Need help planning your boudoir session? I am here to help with these tips on incorporating your partner’s interests for a truly personalized photo shoot:
Sports – This is a popular one. If your man loves sports, bring some sports gear with you. For example, you could wear a jersey from his favorite team/player, or bring a ball, mitt, club, bat, etc.
Occupation – If your guy loves his job, try to incorporate that in your session. If he’s in the military, think dog tags, uniform, etc. If he’s a doctor, try a nurse outfit or lab coat. If he’s a firefighter – borrow his helmet and boots. There are so many options here. Some careers are more difficult to incorporate creatively, but we can even make an office job work. You can totally rock the button down shirt, tie, and briefcase. If you need help, give me a call or send me a text or email and I can help come up with something.
What does he love about you – Think about the things he loves – his favorite part of your body, traits you have that he adores. Maybe he loves your sassiness or playful personality, or how you are shy, sweet, etc. We’ll want to feature these attributes in your session. Does he love it when you walk around in his clothes? Bring some along for an added personal touch.
Fantasy – Does your partner have a fantasy? Surprise him by dressing up for your session. If he’s a big Star Wars fan and always wanted you to wear a gold bikini like Princess Leia, now would be a good time to break out that costume for some sexy sci-fi photos.
Hobbies – What does he like to do for fun? Does he play guitar, read comic books, paint? Bring along items from his hobbies. Is he a country boy? Bring a cowboy hat and boots. Does he enjoy carpentry? Bring his construction hat and tool belt along.
If you need help coming up with a theme for your session to incorporation your partner’s interests, contact me and I will brainstorm with you.
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Choose your Wardrobe – Lingerie is great, but you don’t have wear it if you don’t want to. A button down shirt, sports jersey, oversized sweater, or tight shirt and booty shorts are great alternatives. Be sure to try on your outfit(s) prior to your session to ensure everything fits properly. If you are unsure or at a loss, just ask. We are happy to make suggestions.
Don’t Forget Accessories – Make sure you think about jewelry, shoes, props, etc. Pack anything you need to get it ready for your session. For props, we suggest bringing personal items that are significant to your partner – sports gear, dog tags, military uniform, lab coat, etc.
Hair and Makeup – We highly recommend using a makeup artist. If you need suggestions please contact us. A MUA will make sure that you look flawless and ready for your close up.
Choose a Location – We can help you with this if you don’t already have a location in mind. We tend to do these sessions at hotels, in studio, or at a private outdoor setting.
Exposure – Talk to us prior to the session to let us know what you are comfortable with and how exposed, or unexposed, you want to be during your session. Everyone has a different comfort level, and we like to be aware and informed of your expectations prior to your session so there are no awkward moments.
Pre-Session Beauty Prep – We suggest getting a mani/pedi a few days prior to your session. If you wax, don’t forget to pencil that into your schedule, as well. If you want to have a base tan for your photos, we recommend beginning to tan a few weeks prior to your session to avoid burning – and remember to think about your outfit and avoid any tan lines that will look bad in photos. We suggest staying away from spray tans. Don’t forget to get your eyebrows shaped before your session.
Eat a light breakfast the morning of. Drink a lot of water leading up to your session for beautiful, healthy skin and get a good night’s rest the night before. Shave and moisturize for beautiful legs. Wear a clear deodorant. Don’t wear tight clothing, bras, panties, socks, etc. the morning of your session or driving to your session. These will leave red marks on your skin and we want you looking your best.
Relax – The most important thing you can do is relax. We will make sure you look amazing in your photos, so don’t worry! If you’re uncomfortable, it will show, so just keep calm.
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Getting intoxicated before your session – If you are nervous about your session, it’s OK to have a glass of wine or two to rest your nerves. That said, don’t get intoxicated before your session. This is one of the worst things you can do. Your eyes will be blood shot and droopy and it’s just a recipe for disaster.
Choosing the wrong sized outfits – Choose lingerie that is just the right size for you. You don’t want loose lingerie that gives your body no shape or hides your beautiful curves. On the other hand, lingerie that is too tight can be unflattering.
Heavy Makeup – You don’t want to slather the makeup on too thickly. It’s more about accentuating your natural features and making you feel – and look – stunning. Try to avoid glitter and oil base makeup. Consider having your makeup professionally done. Most makeup artists are familiar with the type of makeup that is most appealing on camera.
Forgetting to shave/wax – Always remember to shave or wax any exposed area that needs to looks smooth and sexy. The ‘au naturel’ look is so ‘70s. Unless you’re going for that vibe.
You and your ladies all show up at the studio or hotel we choose (this will be decided at the time of booking) glam up, drink and just have a good time while you’re waiting for your session.
Each of you will then have your own private 30-minute session. Add to the excitement by incorporating a few shots of your whole group together.
Sounds fun, right? Don’t miss your opportunity to throw your boudoir party. Contact me today to discuss the details and set your date!
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I'm really nervous. Is that normal?
It is definitely normal to be nervous for your boudoir session, so don't worry. Most of my clients are nervous their first time until the session has gone on for a few minutes. After it starts, you’ll begin to loosen up. You will find it quite empowering and a real confidence builder.
How do I know how to pose?
Don’t worry about posing. I've totally got you covered in that department. I know all the tricks to create the most flattering angles for you, no matter what shape or size you are.
What do I wear and do you provide the wardrobe?
Wardrobe is a very personal choice. Boudoir images can range from fine art nude to semi-conservatively dressed and everything in between. The wardrobe you wear should be based on your comfort level and the theme you are wanting to create. You and I can certainly discuss this prior to your session to help you come up with the wardrobe to match the look you are wanting to achieve. I do have several wardrobe items and shoes in studio and available for your use.
Do you offer sessions in other locations?
The short answer is yes, I want to make this experience personal and meaningful to you. Be it your own bedroom space, an office, on the prairie or in a barn, your images should provide meaning to you and those you choose to share them with.
I want share these pictures with my partner, but I don't want loose prints floating around.
This is a very common concern and we totally understand. Your images will be placed in a password protected gallery and will only allowed to be accessed by you or whomever you share the gallery with. We do not publish any images without your express permission.
Any ideas for the best gift?
I offer several print, album and merchandise options that you can order and have shipped directly to your door. For more information on these products, just ask.
What should I bring to my boudoir session?
For our sessions, I suggest a minimum of three different outfits and any props you may want to incorporate. I typically tell ladies to bring an entire suitcase if they want to, that way we have lots of options! Here are a few ideas on popular wardrobe and props:
- Those “booty ” jeans or pants your “significant other” goes gaga over!
- Lingerie… all types, just bring what you feel the sexiest in.
- Boy shorts, panties, g-strings.
- Corsets.
- Fishnet or thigh high stockings.
- Short skirts.
- Sports related, work related or personal interest wardrobe or props (military uniform, sports jersey, fireman’s jacket, work shirt, tie, footballs, guns, guitars, snowboards, surfboards, helmets, roller-skates).
- Jewelry, stilettos, boots, gloves and hats are always fun accessories to add to shots.
Can I bring a friend?
Yes, you can bring a friend if you think it will help you relax. However, sometimes an extra set of eyes has the opposite effect, even if it is a friend. This will be up to you and your comfort level.
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